Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Letter to my High School Self

Linda and I belong to the Mary Jane's Farmgirl site. One of our farmgirl friends posted yesterday on her blog, "My letter to my High School self." I thought it very interesting! Boy oh Boy! if I had all the answers back then, it sure would have kept me out of some of the trials I've gone through. Than the thought came to me, would God want us to know how things were going to work out, or are the situations there to teach us and lead in the right direction. Because, believe me, I have learned a lot over the last 40 years since graduating high school. And at times wished I had known what was ahead of me. I think I'd start my letter to myself kind of like this:
Ok girl, you've grown up in the city and now your thinking of moving to a small town, stop and think this through. But I was in love and I would have followed him anywhere. Then I'd say to me, He wants you to be a stay at home mom and wife, which sounds wonderful. I than would tell me, that I should get some college behind me. Too late, I'm already walking down the isle. Then I'd say, your a very trusting one, but you have to pay attention to what others are saying and doing. And the most important thing I said to me, you believe and love the Lord, but that's not all you need to do spiritually. Well as I think back on these little conversations with myself, I realize that I have grown to be a strong person living in the country, a softer person, caring and doing for others. Stay at home/working mom, I think I did what was best for my children and myself and relationship with my husband. Everybody's life is different and many ladies work things out better in the working group, which I totally admire. Keeping a home and taking care of your family, is very tiring and hard work. But I feel blessed that I was able to be a stay at home mom. We may not have had all the Things, with a capital T, that we would have had if I had worked outside the home, but we had a happy home and the children was glad I was there after school. There are times when I thought I should have gone to college, and even do today. But I've been in the caring place most of my life. Raising my kids and helping with my grand-kids and taking care of my elderly parents. Had I gone on to get a degree, there would have been a lot I would have missed out on. As far as my trust of others, for many years it worked well for me and I had many happy times. But have learned that I must be aware of who, what, and where the situations goes. As far as my relationship with God, from the time when I was a teenager, I Believed, and Loved the Lord. All through my young adult life I thought I was right where I was suppose to be with Christ. When I was in my early 40's I went to a ladies retreat at church, for the weekend. When I came out of that study, I came out of there a different lady. I know longer only believed and loved the Lord, and knew about him, I KNEW HIM! Praise the Lord!!! Don't get me wrong, I still have little sit backs and have my struggles, but know that I can't do it alone. I need him walking beside me at all times. I believe he is, prays he is, and knows that he will guide me in the right directions. I've made many wrong decisions, and only with God am I getting through them. But looking back at that teenager, I don't think she made any really bad decisions. With God going along with them all, they worked out pretty good. And for that I thank the Lord. Maybe now, I'll write as a adult to the high school me!! Show her where she made, maybe not so good decisions and how proud of her I am, even with the little boo boos. Try this looking back and see what the Lord shows you about your past. But the most important thing is, We've made it here and we are who we are meant to be. And if we continue to walk with the teacher who loves us unconditional, I look forward to the years to come. Make this day a loving, caring and worship day to the Lord.

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